what the dr. ordered

August 14, 2006 at 2:42 pm 1 comment

drpepper.jpg

A scantily-clad nubile girl, dripping with sweat and with enormous fake-looking tits, is apparently just what Dr. Pepper ordered from Rockin’ Jelly Bean Art Graphics (www.rockinjellybean.com).

Truth is, I am waaaaaay past the supposed coolness of Hysteric Glamour and using the Playboy bunny ironically. I was kind of hoping Japan would be soon, too. But judging by the average amount of padding in Japanese bras, it’s just wishful thinking on my part. Even worse. I don’t think anyone is even being ironic here.

Yes, I admit it, “erotsy-pop” was once almost cool in a “women should celebrate their difference and not be ashamed of the powerful sex appeal of their bodies” kind of way. But when the image of a ditsy, bust-inflated woman who is “oops”ing her way through life, is accompanied by the words “help me out guys!” (it’s on the side of the can that you can’t see in the image) I can’t help feeling that a sad, insecure man had something to do with this. And with that revelation, I have an uncomfortable feeling that, in fact, female chauvinism, ladette culture and Playboy feminism were all very big, boob-exposing mistakes.

I don’t particularly want to drink out of cans with top heavy, 10-inch waisted, physically impossible women. But unfortunately I am a Dr. Pepper junkie (actually that stuff probably should be illegal or restricted; I swear, if it doesn’t have triple the caffeine of a pack of Pro-plus, then there’s something quite class A going on there…), so for an entire year, I apparently will have no choice. According to www.drpp.jp, this “Pepper Chix” campaign will continue into 2007, post-feminist or not.

My only consolation is that The Pepper Chix do have hips and bums and aren’t stick insects like the female idols and models of today, who are truly frighteningly weird-looking human beings. So, despite the football-sized breasts, I’d rather have teens looking at and aspiring to the figures of these cartoon chix than, say, the real but quite dangerously abnormal Posh.

Actually, I wish fashion, especially teen fashion, would just stop using impossibly skinny girls as their models. Regardless of whether they starve themselves to stay thin or are naturally very thin, they do not represent the average girl or woman. Such pedestalling of odd figures surely perpetuates eating disorders and self-esteem problems for many girls.

Entry filed under: hidden agenda, products. Tags: .

baby on board another bottled drink lover!

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